


Quiet Confessions

by padfootsotter



Category: Thor (Movies)
Genre: Angst, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-31
Updated: 2014-03-31
Packaged: 2018-01-17 16:02:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,155
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1393771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/padfootsotter/pseuds/padfootsotter
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“I miss you too.” Was what he could faintly hear from the wind. He looked up hopeful and watched the night stars twinkling. He smiled and walked back inside.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Quiet Confessions

“What are you doing?” Loki asked her noticing she was on the steps outside of his house in the pouring rain.

 

She turned and smiled at him, “Waiting for you.”

 

“Why?”

 

She shrugged and turned back around, “It’s a pretty day, don’t you think?” She held out her hand, feeling the water wet her hand.

 

He grabbed her shoulders and pulled her up, “It is. But not when you’re about to get sick. Honestly.” He shook his head at her, feeling she was getting colder by the second he rushed her to his house. “What are you thinking? You could get hypothermia.” He grabbed a towel and gave it to her.

 

He heard her laugh, while fixing her up some tea. “I swear to god you’re insane. One day you’re going to kill yourself while doing something silly.” He plopped the tea bag in her mug and waited for the water to boil. He turned around and saw her watching him. “What?” He touched his face, thinking there was something there. “Do I have something on my face?”

 

She shook her head, a small cough coming from her mouth. She gave him back his towel and told her to keep a hold of it. “Thank you.” She said as she brought the mug to her lips. He nodded in acknowledgement.

 

“Now, care to tell me why you’re here?”

 

She coughed again, harshly and longer this time. He cringed as he saw her struggling to breath, “See you’re already getting sick.” He tried to lighten the mood.

 

“I was just around the neighbourhood and I wanted to see you.”

 

“So...you didn’t knock? You just sat there?”

 

“I knew you’d come out sooner or later.” She smiled.

 

Loki looked at her peculiarly, she seemed off...somehow. Well, it was her and she did a lot of random things, that’s what he loved about her. Loki sighed her name, “We haven’t spoke in half a year. What are you really doing here?”

 

Her smile dropped and looked at him, no emotion on her face whatsoever. “Do you still have the envelope I gave you, Loki?”

 

 _‘Envelope? Huh?....Oh right, yeah.’_ He nodded and moved towards his room, getting it. She stopped him with her hand, “I don’t want you to get it Loki. I was just wondering if you still had it.”

 

“Of course, I’d still have it, you told me to keep it, to only open it when something big and devastating happened. I still think you’re barmy.” He rolled his eyes as he returned back to his spot. “Why do you ask?”

 

“Hmm?” She looked at him, she was thinking about the future before. It hurt her head when she thought for a long time. It also hurt her when she was doing things that acquired large energy, such as walking, but she wouldn’t tell him that. “Sorry, I was daydreaming.”

 

“You do that a lot, you know? One of the weirdest things about you.” She smiled at him while he scowled at her.

 

She loved him, he hoped he knew. Sure he wasn’t the nicest person on the planet, but what would you get from a God?

 

“Do you remember what we talked about before?”

 

“When before?”

 

“You know, that day at the Rainbow Bridge? When you took me to Asgard and we talked about the future, while laying down and looked at the stars?”

 

He remembered that day clearly, etched into his mind. He sighed happily as he recalled that day.

Loki took her to Asgard, to meet the rest of his family, well they wanted to meet her. Wanting to see the girl that captured his heart...even though she didn’t know anything about that. That would be kept as a secret for a long time. Loki remembered as they finished their feast and they walked aimlessly down the Rainbow Bridge, stopping around halfway to sit down.

 

She looked like she belonged there, her personality suited it. He remembered there was a breeze which made her dress sway a bit, and her hair flowing in the night sky. If he had a chance to paint any picture, that would be it. That was one of the most defined moment of his life, he thought. Here was a girl who has stuck by him, through thick and thin and he couldn’t even tell her that he loved her. Three little words.

 

Loki remembered sitting down and talking about the future and the what ifs. He remembered her telling him that she wants a huge family one day, living somewhere, maybe Asgard or a small Scottish cottage. Somewhere peaceful and quiet. He wanted to be that guy when she told him.

 

“Judging by your smile, I’m saying you remember?” She interrupted his memories as she gave him a faint sheepish smile.

 

“Bits and pieces.” He bit out. He saw her smile drop a bit and he felt like A-grade ass. “Can’t help it, I’m getting old.” She laughed out loud for this one, and he couldn’t help but smile as well.

 

“I remember telling you about my future, I really hope that one day that happens, you know? With the right guy, hopefully soon.” She whispered her confession. She put her mug in the sink and looked at the clock. “I have to go back to the hos- home. I’ll see you later Loki.” She coughed again and gave him a smile.

 

“I’ll see you later as well, treat your cold.” She waved at him and coughed again. He frowned, she seemed to be having a coughing fit. Thinking nothing of it, he closed the door and sighed.

 

* * *

 

 

Loki felt like ripping the nine realms apart. There was something burning inside his chest, he wished he could rip it out and just toss it. He belted out a scream while thrashing his room. There was a light knock on the door. “Brother?”

 

Loki didn’t bother responding as he flipped his table upside down. “This is not fair! Why? Why brother?  WHY?” He yelled at Thor as he ducked a vase.

 

“Loki, calm down.”

 

“Calm down? You want me to calm down? Do you know how preposterous you sound right now?” Thor furrowed his brows as he took steps towards his brother.

 

“I apologise, but I am very sorry about your loss. Did you know anything?”

 

Loki shook his head as he dropped down to his knees, “She visited me once, she looked fragile and weak, she also had a coughing fit. I did not think anything of it, I thought it was just the flu. Gods, I’m so foolish!”

 

Thor felt the room crack under Loki’s magic. “Hush, Loki. She would have not wanted this.”

 

He placed a comforting hand on Loki’s shoulder, “I am foolish brother, I did not even tell her my true feelings.”

 

Thor knelt down in front of his weeping brother, “I am sure, she knew Loki. And I am sure that she returned those feelings for you. I recall that she gave you something before?”

 

Loki’s eyes widened, filled with tears he ransacked his room until he found the letter from her. “Leave Thor, please.” Thor did not need to be told twice. He walked to the door a single glance back at his brother, he shook his head and closed the door.

 

Loki sat down on the bed, sighing he flipped the enveloped. There it was his name in her tilted handwriting, the letter felt thick and heavy. He carefully opened the enveloped and brought out the letter.  There were several things in there, there was at least five photographs.

 

He looked at them each, one was him, her and the Avengers, he recalled the man in the iron suit had wanted a group photo, and he insisted annoyingly that Loki be a part of it. Another was him trying to figure out how to cook, the third her and him in the park with Darcy, Jane and Thor. The fourth was just him and her, him being in a Midgardian suit attire. And the last...the last took his breath away. It was a photo of him and her on that night sitting on the Rainbow Bridge. _‘How?’_ He thought.

 

He put the letter and the other photographs by his side and looked at the picture. It seemed magical and staged, but it was not. He could see himself staring at her lovingly from a far and her staring right back at him. ‘Who took this photo?’ It was perfect.

 

He closed his eyes and put the photo close to his chest. “Oh...oh, my love.” He gently put t beside him and grabbed the letter and began reading it.

 

_Loki,_

_Hello you. You’re probably wondering why I gave you a letter right? Or not, since you’re used to well me being me._

_I’m writing this letter because, well today I just found out I had cancer. I don’t know if you know anything about it, but incase if you don’t. Well, it’s a Midgardian disease, there’s no known cure for it, I’m pretty sure. I don’t know if they have it in Asgard…_

_Now, you’re thinking that why wouldn’t I tell you? Well, it’s simple, really. I wanted to be with you. I wanted you to be happy and not have this thing over your head. I wanted you to be YOU while being with me. But then, the treatments and such got into the way of that. I know we haven’t spoken in around 5 months and now I’m just giving you a letter out of the blue, but I needed this. I needed to write you this._

_These will be my last words Loki. My last words for you._

_You don’t know how much you mean to me. You are my everything, my stars, my moon, my life. Do you remember that day when we sat on the Rainbow Bridge? That was the day I wanted to tell you everything. Everything that I felt for you, wanted from you._

_When I told you I wanted to live somewhere quiet and have a big family, I wanted that. With YOU. There was no one else that can make me feel the way you did. When I was around you I felt like I was on fire, I was being re-born. You made me feel like me. You made me feel complete._

_I wish I could have that future with you, I goddamn wished I didn’t have this! I wish that we could have Midgardian, half Jotunn babies. Wow, that would have been a sight? Can you imagine dropping them off to preschool? Or when I gave birth to them?_

_I have never regretted anything._

_The only thing I regretted was not telling you in person that I love you._

_I goddamn love you so much. More than I thought could be possible._

_Those are my last words for you my Loki. Please be happy. Anyway, I won’t be really gone, I’ll be watching over you...gods that sounded weird._

_I love you._

 

Loki carefully folded the letter back, tears in his eyes he grabbed the items and marched towards the Bifrost.

 

* * *

  
  


 

Once he reached it, he hastily wiped his eyes. “Heimdall, I am sure you know why I am here.”

 

Heimdall nodded, “I am very sorry for your loss. I just wanted to let you know she loved you greatly, and that it was you she was thinking about when she passed.”

 

Loki felt his heart clench and nodded solemnly to Heimdall who let him go onto the Bifrost. “I’m trusting you know where I want to go?”

 

He felt the rush of the Bifrost as he was taken to his destination. Loki landed on the ground with a thud and looked up at the landscape before him.

 

* * *

 

 

It was a little cottage, on a cliff, over looking the Scottish sea. This was the place that he secretly bought for her. He walked to the door and opened it. He breathed in and smelt the wood. He walked around the small cottage, going outside via the garden.

 

He looked up at the night stars. “The only thing I regretted was not telling you that I love you. And now it is too late.

 

“You see this cottage, I bought for you, when you told me you wanted somewhere quiet and peaceful, I bought this for you. You don’t know how much hassle I had to go through buying this for you.” He laughed and the stars twinkled. “I miss you.” He whispered. He felt a gust of wind hitting him.

 

“I miss you too.” Was what he could faintly hear from the wind. He looked up hopeful and watched the night stars twinkling. He smiled and walked back inside.

 

This is where he would live, this is where he would stay, until the day she comes back to him, taking him to a better life.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Do review and leave messages! Do you guys like it? Do you? Do you? :)  
> Anyways, feedback would be appreciated! Thank you for reading!


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